The List

Ok, I'm grumpy this morning.
And I don't think the weather is helping...
Right now Jonathan is napping, I have a load of laundry going...and B is (**shhh!***) playing with his cars. So I'm going to vent.
About my toddler.
I'm not even going to preface this list with all of the things I love about him...and how delightful he can be when we're out and about. Because I wanna just get right to it.
Lately I feel like everything is a f***ing struggle with this kid, causing so much frustration on my part that I'm seriously ready to tear my hear out come naptime. Even as I type, I'm nervously waiting for the hell that will descend on the kitchen when he's done with his trains and wants to go outside, but can't...since J's sleeping, and it's wet outside.

So, here are the top earners of my stress lately:
1. As previously mentioned, the outside factor. This one is twofold: wants to go out alll the time, and when he can't, unleashes the "mad cry"....and when already outside, and needs to come in, the same tantrum ensues while trying to coerce him inside.
2. The step. It's not working.
3. Listening. Doesn't seem to know how to do it.
4. Brushing his teeth. Gets the toothbrush in there, but usually just sucks the toothpaste off the brush and then demands "more brush?", which is his way of asking for more yummy paste to slurp away at. And for the love...he WON'T let me get in there to show him how to brush properly...and no matter how many times we listen to the Raffi song about "Brushing your teeth...chicka, chicka..chickachicka..", he doesn't get it, and doesn't want to anytime soon. So, in the meantime, I am having nightmares about his first dentist visit...nightmares.
5. Green veggies. The child who used to devour anything I put in front of him has suddenly decided to go on green veggie strike. Jonathan is in heaven with my frozen green beans, all heated up with butter on them...so he keeps his mommy sane in that dept. But Benjamin just scoffs at them and asks for "gwillled cheeeezzze???". And no, nothing wrong with grilled cheese, but seriously...every fricking meal? The other staple he'll go for is mac 'n cheese (what kid doesn't?)...so the other night I tried mixing in some chicken breast and green beans...he managed to eat every single Kraft-manufactured noodle...and left every piece of lovingly-prepared roasted chicken and green beans on his plate.
***this is me, smirking***
6. Likes to take off his diaper and run around the house naked. While this is often hysterical and hard to get mad at...it's yet another sign that this kid might be ready for potty-training. And yet, whenever I try to work with him on it, he couldn't seem less interested.
Perhaps I'll put my mom and dad on this project while we're away this weekend...hmmmmm...
7. Every time I try to do the littlest thing away from him...you know...like my blog for FIVE MINUTES...he finds me and demands I put on a show of mommy-fabulousness-playtime for him. He's at my ankles as I type, which is what brought me to this last, but oh-so-necessary-point.

Off I go.