When it rains, it pours.

Brian's been in Salt Lake this week, which has been good for a few reasons. I'll get those out of the way now, because anyone with kids knows those "good" moments are few and far between when you're the only one at the homestead. Let's be honest--I'm just trying to be nice, by including the happy times...because in reality the last few days have been from H.E.L.L.

Brian travels often, so I can't say it's always this way. In fact, the boys and I are pretty much a well-oiled machine each day. It's just those early morning/evening times...and the cumulative effect of manning them all alone that seems to chip away at my sunnier side.

So here they are, the happy moments:
*taking a nap in my bed with Benjamin Monday afternoon...and right before I fell asleep, hearing him say, while facing me with his head on his pillow, "have a good nappers, mommy".

*seeing Jonathan take a STEP!

*playing with the gardenhose yesterday in the driveway with Benjamin...and soaking him, while he giggled hysterically

*taking a stroll up the block Monday morning and seeing Stephanie and the girls (and Sarah, briefly, as she whisked by with the jogger-stroller)

*Benjamin owning the room at "laptime"...so absurd...

*anytime spent singing with Benjamin and watching how Jonathan reacts--his best move is the "talk to the hand" jerking of the head...it's ridiculously funny


Now for the list, and the people who are currently on mine:

*the many (though not new) times Benjamin sneaked out while I was putting Jonathan down for a nap upstairs

*leaving my wallet at the gift shop at the Children's Museum...only to realize when I went to pay for my friend (who visited from out of town) and myself. it was supposed to be "on me"...but as her luck would have it, I couldn't find my wallet and she got the check. real nice.

*Benjamin's tantrum of epic proportions at Children's Museum gift shop (I'm blaming the wallet debacle on this moment of total chaos)

*realizing I was out of coffee creamer Wednesday morning...when I needed my coffee the most (by the way, when did I turn into such a coffee wimp? creamer??)

*things that don't normally spill--gallons of milk, laundry detergent, canisters of Gerber puffs, contents of my diaper bag, bottle/glass recycle container under sink in kitchen, infant ibuprofen, you name it...it spilled. and if Jonathan was awake at the time--he played in it.

*freaky neighbor Andy

*grumpy/bitchy lady at Pooh's Corner

*freaky neighbor Andy

*person who owns Peapod (grocery delivery service)...needs to wake the F up and open a service in my neighborhood. sistah needs a bottle of wine at night sometimes...ok?

Truth be told, the days here this week without Brian weren't filled with anything that other moms (or crazy, forgetful, spastic women) don't go through each day with their kids...it's just that when it's one thing after the next, often within the span of five minutes...and with no relief at the end of the day, beginning of day...etc....you get my drift.
And the whole "helpful mom (Nana)" ceased to be "helpful" many moons ago, so we're finding it much easier to go it alone...spilled containers, missed opportunities to exercise, etc...none of it's as bad as a heavy dollup of guilt over the 101 things I do wrong. And God bless her, cause she really does mean to help...but it's always at such a high premium to my sanity.
So...love my kids and all, but come Wednesday night, I kinda wanted to commit murder on somebody. Not on my kids...just on somebody...like, perhaps my creepsville-neighbor, Andy.

And then, Brian gets home last night, and more chaos ensues, involving a broken key ignition on our Camry, which Brian discovers at midnight at Kent County airport...
At lunchtime I ask Brian if I can run some errands while the boys take their afternoon naps, and he suggests that I just take the rest of the afternoon to myself, that he can manage the boys and still get some work done.
I rejoice, apologize to him for calling him ungrateful and unappreciative (need to mention here that he was wined and dined in Salt Lake with sushi, drinks, and other fancy meals..oh, and a bed and bathroom he got to enjoy ALONE) and run to pack my MAC bag and call up Panopolous to get the unibrow waxed...
I put both boys down for their naps, and while I'm reading to Benjamin, he looks up at me and says "Mommy silly...Mommy read books funny"...and I melt. I head downstairs to the very quiet kitchen and go to grab my keys, etc...and suddenly, I don't want to leave. I don't want to go anywhere! I just want to be here when they both wake up.
So freakin ridiculous...SO unbelievably ridiculous.
An unprecedented moment of complete freedom and abandon, and all I can think of is how Benjamin won't want me to read Goodnight Moon to him in a few years.

Ugh.
So, the point of my story. Don't think I have one.
But, I can still safely say without any hesitation or false pretense: Life is so very GOOD.